LGBT: Why did Granny Lou get fired from her job as the Walmart Greeter?
ByHi y’all,
It’s me, Granny Lou! I have quite a bit of a problem that I would like to have your opinions on.
Well, I got me a job as a greeter at the local Walmart (located next to Al’s Fish and Booze Barn on Route 3). As you know, only the most beautiful and qualified individuals can get such a prestigious position and thats why they hired Granny right on the spot.
Anyways y’all, as I was doing my job, I thought it would help Granny get through the day if I took me some shine in me big ol’ jug. For some reason the management did not like that and fired me do to “drunken tirades and indecent exposure”. Heck, all I did was run around the store in my mornin’ glories when I had a hot flash, big deal. And so what if I mooned the Monroe family, they be giving me dirty looks!
I just dont understand what I did wrong to get fired!
I think it’s discrimination against the old and cute!
Wait till my senator heres about this!!
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7 Comments
January 14th, 2011 at 7:24 pm
isn’t wal mart for poor people anyway?
January 14th, 2011 at 7:24 pm
I’m sure there are better jobs for you.
Don’t give up, Granny Lou!
January 14th, 2011 at 7:43 pm
Ya know only two things smell like tuna…. well obviously you smelled like booze. Walmart hates imposters. Its hard enough to pretend not to be china dot com. They jus be jealous sweetheart.
January 14th, 2011 at 8:06 pm
Thats funny. I needed that laugh
January 14th, 2011 at 9:04 pm
lol…Is this Granny Ying too???? hahahaha…..how was the dog competition in China??? rofl.
January 14th, 2011 at 9:06 pm
i would definitely sue them!!!!!
welcome back..
January 14th, 2011 at 9:57 pm
I’m sorry, Granny Lou, but you are mistaken in saying that Wal-Mart has such high standards. Actually, the opposite is true. You were most likely fired when Walmart realized that you were, in fact, OVER QUALIFIED for the position.
Walmart only keeps the worst, rudest employees. Had you yelled at some teenagers and called them “b-tches” or threatened some people, I think you would still be employed.
As a general rule, this is how a Wal-Mart employee should act:
1. Always believe what your fellow employees say without taking the time to hear the issues from the customer’s perspective (the customer is NEVER right)
2. When a customer is calling for assistance, ignore him or her. If he/she persists, continue to ignore the customer and then yell that you heard him/her. Then, come up with an excuse as to why you cannot help, yell at the customer again, and storm off
3. Call customers “b-tches” and other terms.
4. Threaten customers indirectly (“I’m going to go street on you.”)
5. Allow customers to use a permit to make returns and then suddenly decide that only an actual license can be used. Yell at the customer for not following the policy before.
6. Inform customers of an exchange/return limit and then blame customer for not knowing of this policy beforehand.
7. If you are a cashier, shut off your light when a customer is in your line and tell him/her that your line is closed. Walk off. Once those customers have been checked out, turn your light back on and continue to serve other customers.
8. Tell customers to “f—off” and give them the middle finger
9. At the self-checkout counter, do not talk to customers that need assistance. If a customer needs a price check, grab the item and bring back a simmilar, though damaged, item. Claim that the UPC code for each individual item in the store is different.
As you can see, you are much too qualified for a position at Wal-Mart, especially one where customers are likely to interact with you.